You’ve been taught to hold if off as long as you can from counselors at school, sex ed instructors, and your parents at home but what happens when you feel like YOU are ready? Here are THREE questions you should ask yourself before you have your sexual debut.
- IS THE SEX FOR YOU OR FOR THEM?
Losing your virginity is a BIG DEAL regardless of how you look at it. Sex is desensitized to us being that it is on television , Twitter, Instagram, and music videos but all in all it is a very sacred moment of intimacy. What you DON’T want to do is have sex with someone simply to appease them. If you are not ready to have sex then your sexual debut may turn into a very BIG regret. Do it because you WANT to have sex not because you feel compelled to.
2. THE SEX TALK 2.0
It’s ridiculous how many times we have to talk about sex in our lifetimes. The initial conversation we have with our parents, the classes we are forced to take in school, and the unruly doctor’s visit when they ask you if your sexual active in front of your parents (CRAZY EMBARRASSING). But now you must prepare for the the most important encounter or “Sex Talk 2.0,” as I like to call it. Bottom line is, If you can’t TALK about sex with your partner than you shouldn’t even think about HAVING sex. “Who is bringing condoms? Should you get on birth control? How many partners have you had, and when is the last time you were tested?” If they find your answers annoying, or “ruining the mood,” you need to run and RUN FAST.
3. THE “SOUL TIES”
Is it a myth or is there some truth behind it? Do we REALLY build an attachment to someone after having sex with them or is that just another tactic used to stop us from having sex? Lemme just tell you, that sh*t is VERY VERY real. Some people can have sex, have a falling out, and successfully move on without even thinking about it….I was not one of those people. Granted, you may not be crazy or overly emotional after but you will feel a void whenever they do ANYTHING that hurts your feelings. You may feel a new attachment to this person in ways you could never explain, or you may feel nothing. It’s all subjective, but regardless are YOU ready for that?
Sex is a great way to communicate with someone you really care about, and I’m not telling you that you SHOULDN’T have it. I’m recommending that you go through these three questions before you embark on your newfound “Sexual Debut.”